Lately I’ve been learning more about dependence on God. You always hear people talking about how we need to give God everything in our lives and not hold on to anything. Lately that has really been sinking in. Don’t you love it when a truth that you’ve known for a long time finally sinks in and actually changes stuff in you?
Almost without realizing it, I put my trust more in men than I would like to admit. Growing up I would make my family, AWANA, youth group, friends, and church a place where I find out who I am. And who did I become? I became a guy who knew what to say and when to say it. I became a guy who put his identity in those things I listed…making decisions based on what I knew would be in line with the values of those groups. I wouldn’t say that I lived one way in one group of people and a complete different way in a different group of people, but I would say that I made a large amount of decisions based with how I was being perceived by those in those groups in mind. What would my faith look like with just my Bible? No Christian friends, no church, no Northwestern, nothing except God’s Word?
As some of you know, this year at Northwestern has been a struggle in some areas. Last spring I was elected to Student Government. From what I knew of Student Government, I was just going to have a fun year of leading dumb activities and being popular. However, this year has been far from that (obviously being popular was never within my grasp though, so I expected it). This year of Student Government has been questioning the integrity of brothers and sisters in Christ, hearing two sides to issues of morals (while desiring to respect and look up to both sides of people), but most importantly this year has been about the truth. As it turns out, there are a lot of sinners in the church and the community of believers (note the tongue in cheek). There will be conflict. But how we deal with that conflict is what differs between secular society and the church (ideally). I am proud of Northwestern College; I love how people are concerned about ideas of theological drift. Those are things that we should be concerned regarding! The biggest thing that I have learned through all of the uncertainties that are in my life is that I need to trust God with my ENTIRE life. Not just the areas I find easy to leave up to Him. If it’s God’s will…I’ll get into medical school…I’ll get married…heck, I’ll even graduate from college…and the list goes on. It’s my job to entrust Him and allow him to do WHAT HE WANTS.
Lately I’ve found myself slipping into the mold of doing and saying things for the praise and appreciation of others. I hate that about myself. Lately verses such as Psalms 18:2 have been great reminders to me. This verse states, “The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.” What a great reminder for me and anyone for that matter. Who is our “rock”? Who is our “fortress”? Who is our “refuge”? Is it a relationship we cherish more than God, a status we desire more than God, or an opportunity we strive toward more than we strive to know God more? Do we care more about the praise of man or of God? I don’t know about you, but I’m sick of trying to please. Isn’t it easier to put ourselves in the hand of God? At least he promises to “never leave nor forsake you.” Let's cling to that promise by someone who will never let you down.
Because of Him,
J. Hylander
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